Tuesday was sonnet day in English. While we were studying them, I could barely contain my disdain for these people who had seen a (seemingly physically attractive) person once and devoted their lives to pretending to be madly in love with them.
I then returned home and wrote one myself.  Well, it's not actually a sonnet because the rhyme scheme is messed up, but we shall pretend for Erin's sake!

He brings me to his dwelling bare
to show me that there's nothing there
that I could ever hold.
What cruel master leads me so,
giving to and taking fro,
pushing into the cold?
'Tis Cupid, that mischeivous boy
hath made many a clever ploy,
pulling all towards;
When all are certain of the catch,
he reaches in--a vicious snatch
has stolen our rewards.
Alone, we cry, we weep, we pine
for that lover, so divine--
O, have them we must!
We do not know, so filled with rue,
That our beloved pineth too
for love from even us.
So from afar two lovers gaze
at the other, waiting for praise
which won't come without a nudge.
Neither moves--rejection's fear
is looming far too close and near--
in love they will not budge.

It's really bad because all the rhymes seemed really forced and I broke rhythm and I kind of suck in general... but disregarding all of that, it might potentially be a decent poem.

<sigh> I'm exactly like my mother....

I am disgusted by myself.
Not just a "gee, I don't really like myself very much" kind of thing.  If I think about myself and who I really am for any amount of time I fear becoming physically sick.
Like right now.

Looking at my journal over the past months, I can't believe how wretched of a person I am.  I almost wonder what they would find if they were to cut me open right now and search around my innards for something that's supposed to be there but has rotted away in the sickly sweet facade that I wrap around myself.  It's like perfume that one has applied too heavily for too long.  I smell bad with the perfume--my disguise--but surely I smell worse without it.  But nobody would ever know that because I can never go without it.

I don't know which I hate worse, people not understanding me
or people understanding me.